My college roommate fretted endlessly about what her purpose in life was. She was driven to understand why she was on this planet. In sharp contrast to her drive was my seeming indifference to why I was here. It never occurred to me to think about my purpose. I didn’t seem to need one. I was just here, doing my thing.
“My thing” changed periodically, and that was fine with me. Swimming was a passion from the age of two. I loved making things as a kid. Architecture intrigued me. As I graduated from high school I ached to go to interior design school, but my parents blocked my way because their kids were going to go to college. I’d loved genetics in high school science classes, but found myself studying a liberal arts program for a degree in environmental conservation.
I was a teletype operator, receptionist, and special events coordinator before I went back to college for some skills classes. And that’s when I discovered computer programming. No stress in any of that, just following the flow of life.
Since those college years I’ve had several crises that forced me to consider what my purpose was, what I wanted to do with my life. The first one was a profound turning point that put me in my bed and breakfast career.
I refer to it as a turning point, and I guess the last “step” was a point, but the realization came along a path. Being laid off from my computer programming job opened my eyes to the fact that while I loved programming, I didn’t have all that it took to be a really good one. My degree in Environmental Conservation wasn’t going to garner me any jobs.
Thinking I had no clue as to what I could do to earn money and support myself I took aptitude tests, personality tests, and read What Color Is Your Parachute. Nothing came to me, nothing became obvious for my next career.
In the meantime, I got married and we took a month-long honeymoon that we’d been planning. My grandmother lovingly pointed out that we’d been paying for the trip all along the way, and it might be our last chance to go on such a trip — we should go, have fun, and come back to job hunting after the honeymoon. So, off to Europe we went to follow the Danube River from source to mouth.
One week of the trip was cruising up the Danube from Bulgaria to Germany. There were only seven Americans on the cruise, with Germans comprising the bulk of the rest of the guests. We became good friends with one couple in particular; he was an accountant and she a teacher. He urged me to go into accounting or even become a certified financial planner, but no surge of excitement or energy happened at that suggestion.
One morning I woke suddenly with the thought that I should be a B&B innkeeper. I was amused by that thought since I’d never been in a B&B and didn’t know what it entailed. But, it felt right.
When we got home I marched into the B&B in town, asked how I could learn to be an innkeeper, and signed up for a class that started the very next week. Oh, what a joy it was for me to attend that class! The drawback was that my dream was to have a 5-room inn and the experts stressed that you had to have at least 10 rooms to make money. I couldn’t reconcile those differences.
It was a few years later before anything came of my dream. It was going into the inn to sell them an ad in a local women’s magazine that opened the door to me becoming an innkeeper. I was hired to manage that bed and breakfast! And I did it for over two years — loving every second of it, and every aspect of it.
When I left the inn it was to open my consulting firm to teach others how to open and operate their B&Bs, to turn their dreams into reality. I followed that passion for over 25 years.
As suddenly as I had awakened knowing that’s what I wanted to do, I awoke one morning knowing I was done with that career. Another crisis.
I stressed about it for awhile, but then realized that the stress would keep me from finding my next career. Being quiet and still would allow the wisdom — the knowing — to come through. So, I followed life’s path for several years, testing the waters with my toes to see if the myriad opportunities that came my way were a fit, to see if they lit me up with enthusiasm.
Taking classes seems to be one way for me to explore possibilities. Surrounding myself with upbeat and entrepreneurial types seems to help too, just like it did during my honeymoon with the accountant and teacher. This felt as if it was going to be another long discovery path, not a turning point.
And yes, one day I realized that I had something to give others. LOL! I just didn’t have quite the words I needed to explain what that was. No worries, I knew the right words would come. And they did. Now my purpose is to coach professionals on building and maintaining a high energy level so they can live productive, alert, and happy lives.
What I learned through the years is that there are lots of reasons we are here. You can have many purposes and passions to share with the world. Maybe your passion will be your job or your business, or maybe it will be your hobby. Whatever form it takes, it’s your gift to give the world.